Unemployment Chronicles, Day 0: This Is the End

Today is my very last day at Farmers, even more so than my previous last day.  Today we sever all ties.

I had a question relating to my departure from Farmers this morning , so I called the Zurich HR Service Center to ask.  I got a message saying that all of that group was in a meeting, and I left my name and number and my question.  Four and a half hours later, I called them again, because they had not called me, and I got my answer.  It makes me so proud to be a former member of their organization.

No word from the permanent jobs I have applied to (Boeing would be nice),  but both of the largest recruiters I am working with have contacted me this week with contract possibilities, with one employer ready to interview me as soon as tomorrow.

The question that keeps coming up is, was it worth it, leaving Farmers?  Now that we know it's not so easy to find anything else, and the possibilities that have popped up pay a lot less than what I was making, was it still a good thing to do?

Well, first, I didn't have a lot of great options, although I could have exercised more control over the way I left, maybe gotten a job first, for example.  Second, I was able to leave on very decent terms, and I had said for a long time that if they offered me a deal (like severerance) to leave, I would take it.  It didn't exactly work like that, but trust me, I didn't get screwed.  I was happy with the deal.  Most importantly, I had grown to hate many things about my job, and I do mean hate, not just dislike.

So now I am looking at paying for health insurance via COBRA, with no known future source of income, after four months of trying to find something, hoping for a temporary job that will pay much less than I was making.  But instead of sticking with something I really couldn't stand, I am at least trying to find something more tolerable.  And yeah, I'm happy with that.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day -3: D-Day

There is something I may have alluded to, but never really got too specific about, and I still have to address this carefully.  If you look at the title of this post -- not the D-Day part, but the part that says day minus 3 -- you can maybe guess.  The truth is that all the time I have been writing the Unemployment Chronicles, I have been employed, technically.  I have not been working, and I have been looking for work and using outplacement services, but in terms of benefits and my tenure at Farmers, I am still employed.  It's complicated.

July 31 is my last day of this status.  After that, barring a last-minute miracle, I will be truly unemployed, no benefits, file-for-unemployment-payments unemployed.

So this will mean a few new activities.  Obviously I will want to apply for unemployment and start tracking my job search activities for the unemployment people.  Also, I already received information about COBRA, with the first payment due August 1.  The way things are going, I can't get by without health insurance.

Beyond that, because I passed my 55th birthday last weekend, I am early retiring, which means I have a few small benefits that I have to manage.  I can take my pension immediately, or I can defer it, and I think there is a decision to be made regarding whether it pays out until I die or until Jackie and I both die (with a lower payout.)  Since Jackie is younger and female and in better health, that part might be an easy choice.  In addition, retirement means I can get some help with my medical insurance, which is nice because COBRAs are expensive.

I can't remember for sure, but I don't think that Jackie and I have ever been unemployed at the same time since we got together almost 20 years ago.

Meanwhile, I applied for a job Friday and noticed that the HR director for the company looked at my Linked-In profile a few hours later.  I also contacted another recruiter, sent him resume, and made plans to meet him next week.  The search goes on.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 125: Fifty-Five

I turned 55 Saturday, and although birthdays and nice round numbers generally don't mean much, this one has some significance, because for the first time I am officially a senior for certain purposes.  Yes, AARP lets you in when you turn 50, but they are kind of an exception.  I still don't think I will officially be a full-fledged senior until I'm 65, or maybe 66.5, which is my social security retirement age, but 55 is a start.

First and most important, I can early retire at age 55, and in fact I will, from Farmers.  There are not a lot of advantages to early retirement -- I don't have a pension that I can live off, and my post-retirement benefits are minimal, but I do have a pension (very small), and I do get some help with health care.  Also, my brother tells me that I can now withdraw money from a 401K plan without penalty, which unfortunately may come in handy.

Beyond that, the benefits are smaller.  Jackie says I can get 10% off on groceries Tuesdays at Fred Meyer.  Some places give senior discounts stating at age 55.  The fun of taking them is maybe more important than the benefits.

As it turns out, this year approaching my early seniorhood has been challenging in terms of my health, so besides approaching a milestone birthday, I have had that reminder that I am getting old.  I found out from a routine physical that I have diabetes.  I just went through testing for thyroid cancer again, at least partly because my endocrinologist sees a lymph node in my neck that may be cancerous.  I had periods when I really did not feel well, in retrospect probably due to the diabetes.  I started taking blood pressure medicine.

Honestly, it hasn't been the greatest year.  These should be some of the best times of life, but they're off to a poor start.  Gotta fix that.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 120: Reboot

First, I typed "Restart" into Google images, and this bunch of questionable-looking bozos popped up.  I bet their music sucks.  ( I looked them up on iTunes - I win!)

Second, yesterday my blog reached 5,000 pageviews all-time, since I started posting occasionally in 2008, with more than 3,000 coming since I became unemployed in March.  For someone who hated, really hated, writing when he was young, I find it amazing that I even ever wanted to do this, let alone that anyone would read it.  So those of you who read, thanks.

Third, a tip to aspiring writers.  I start with an idea which becomes a title, then I find a picture.  Once I paste in the picture, even if it's just some dopey-looking kids, the post usually flows fairly easily from there.  I don't know why, but there you go.

I guess it's time to assume that the contracting gig is not going to pan out.  During the last few weeks, about six job possibilities were brewing, enough that I thought I was on the verge of getting something, but they all either faded away or burst into flames.  This is taking too long, and right now everything is very dead.  So I need to put more energy into looking for a permanent job, which I really dread.  I think I am in a bad position because my last job paid too much, I don't want to do that anymore, and I'm old, for the job market anyway.  The contracting idea was such a good one.  Damn.

However, my friend John, one of my few known loyal readers, saw my last post and pointed out that most of the people on the Hindenburg actually survived, which surprised me -- I had assumed they all were barbecued, but not so.  Two were still alive in 2007.  So perhaps there is still hope.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 116: Crash, Burn

Some days I have trouble choosing a picture for my blog post.  Not today.

I had an interview Thursday, with an insurance company, as I mentioned in my last post.  They were going to talk to one other person, but I had prepared well for this interview and was able to talk to them about specific issues in their financial statements; I made it clear that I knew what I was doing, so I had high hopes.

It turns out that one of them knew the other guy they interviewed and had worked with him before.  I guess they brought me in so they could say they did their due diligence and talked to two people.

And that leaves me with very little in the pipeline.  The recruiters said they would submit my resume to the same company for a different job.  An acquaintance knows someone who needs a senior accountant, no idea for what pay yet or job requirements.  Otherwise it's search for jobs and apply online.

I mentioned to the recruiter that after three months, and only one interview generated by her firm, I was beginning to question whether anyone can make a living working with them.  What I didn't tell her is that I am willing to take jobs that I could do with one hand tied behind my back and that pay 2/3 of what I used to make, and it's still taking a long time.

She said that once you get that first job, it gets a lot smoother, but that finding the first position is tough.  That is at least some consolation, because that has been my working assumption, so perhaps it will be so.  In any case, I hope I gave her the idea that I am interested in working soon.

July 31 is kind of an important date; after that, I start to eat into savings that I was really hoping I could, you know, save.  I figure we can go two to three years before we actually move under a bridge, although that would mean using our retirement money, and Lucas's fairy godmother paying for his college, but anyway, we won't starve anytime soon.  Still, this could have a big impact on my retirement plans.  I'd rather not get that far.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 114: What's Next?

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance,
For a break that would make it okay.

Sarah McLachlan

This morning, I had another interview.  This one went better than the last one, and since it was with an insurance company, I was able to show that I understood quite a bit about their process.

However...they were going to talk to one more person and then make a decision, probably today, and they asked if I could start tomorrow if necessary.  And it's 6:00 in the evening, and I have heard nothing, and that's not a good sign.  Of course, the company could just be taking some time to get their ducks in a row, but the more time passes, the more likely they are going with someone else.

Whether leaving Farmers was good or bad is still up in the air.  A break would make it OK; I really look forward to doing anything besides what I was doing there.  But I am still waiting for that break.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 112: Sliding Doors

I don't know how many people will understand the reference to Sliding Doors, but it's an excuse to post a picture of Gyneth Paltrow, which can't be too bad.  The movie was about two parallel paths that a woman's life takes, depending on whether she catches a train or misses it (which depends on whether a little girl's mother moves the girl out of the way.)  So there, now you all understand the reference.

My life can take a couple of different paths at this point, and although the long-term-unemployed-lose-your-house-live-under-a-bridge scenario seemed like a long shot at one time, it keeps creeping up on me.

I still have time.  However, I have seen several opportunities in the last few weeks, and it's hard to feel confident that if none of these work out, the opportunities will keep coming.  I really feel the need to make one of these work.

I have another interview Thursday, this time with an insurance company, which gives me some advantage.  If it works out, the job could start as early as Monday.  Beyond that, there is nothing very concrete in the works, just a couple of possibilities.  So this one really matters.  If I can get one job as a contractor, and do that one well, I'll feel a lot more confident that I can do this for a living.

On the other hand, if I get through July and still can't get something, I should probably start looking for a nice bridge, just in case.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 111: Multi-Tasking

111 days is a lot.

Today is another rant about the silliness of corporate America, inspired by my interview last week.  The interviewer asked me about my weaknesses, areas where I could improve.  I told her that I wasn't a great presenter, an answer I had prepared.  (No one cares much if accountants aren't great presenters, for the most part.)  But she was persistent and asked if there was anything else.  Finally I said that I was not a big fan of too much multi-tasking.

Mistake.

She jumped on that, said we do a lot of that here.  Of course you do.  Then she went on to explain that I wouldn't just be able to work on one thing at a time; there would be meetings and phone calls and multiple priorities.  OK, now you're just being insulting.

Let's be clear about one thing:  I won't do that again,  If I have to name two areas for improvement, next time I'll mention that I was criticized once for not firing someone quickly enough.  True story.  I'm not sure my answer had anything to do with my not getting the job, but it didn't help.

Let's be clear about another thing:  I would rather be right than say what people want me to say.  Yes, this approach works out horribly for me, often , but I get the satisfaction of being right, and that means a lot to me, for some reason.

That said, I am right to question the devotion to the wonders of multitasking, and the corporate stooges who disagree with me are wrong.  A number of people who deal with lots of interruptions and try to handle too many responsibilities have a sense that it's unproductive.  I certainly did.  Multitasking leads to those days when you work all day and don't feel like you got anywhere.  It only makes sense that, if you spend too much time bouncing from one task to the next, you are wasting time between tasks.  I compare it to trying to (literally) juggle; if you are asked to juggle a few objects, you can learn to do that efficiently.  If you are asked to juggle more than you possibly can, you will drop something, or ignore something, or keep trying and get frustrated.

And lo and behold, research confirms what people know intuitively.  People are not really wired to be good multi-taskers.  We need time to concentrate on one thing at a time.  People who think that they are good multi-taskers typically are not.  But the idea is so entrenched in corporate America that you can't change it.

Not that I didn't try.  At one job I had, a long time ago, I sent my boss a copy of an article indicating that multi-tasking was overrated, then pointed out to her that one of the top executives in the company had told us to work on just a few things at a time, in a presentation we had all seen.  She said that she wished he had not said that, because we all have to work on lots of things.  It just didn't fit her preconceived notion, which turned out to be that multi-tasking was more or less the only important skill in the world.

So, I am right, and up to 111 days.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 109: Affordable Health Care

As I close in on the possibility that I will be not only unemployed, but without benefits soon (I still have my benefits through July 31), health care is looming as a big issue.  It's not the best timing to find out you're diabetic two months before your health care goes away.

As it is, my insulin is already costing me $450 a month.  I have high-deductible health insurance, so the cost just flows through to me until I hit my deductible.  I'll hit that soon, because in two weeks I am scheduled for a thyroid scan, and those things are expensive.  Once I hit my deducitble, ongoing costs will be better, but I have to keep my insurance.

So unless I get a job, that means COBRA.  Really expensive, but not as likely to bankrupt me as going without insurance would be.

I guess I need a job, for the benefits if not the pay.  The interview I went to Tuesday didn't pan out; the company is going to keep looking, but they don't want me.  I'm disappointed, but I learned from the interview, and it's so hard to say why they didn't choose me, I can't read too much into it.  I asked for feedback, but they did not provide any.

At least three more possibilities are still in the works.  I just really want to get that first opportunity, get past that, demonstrate that I can do this.  Then I will feel a lot more confident that I can make this work.

Unemployment Chronicles, Day 105: Shades of Grey

For starters, Jackie wanted me to read the book 50 Shades of Grey and report back to her, so I did.  Briefly, this is what I thought:

• The story is mildly engaging.  It's an easy read.
• The writing is surprisingly bad.  Read some of the bad reviews on Amazon, particularly ones that note the repetition of certain phrases.  Very funny.
• If I had been reading for my own interest, I would have stopped not too far in.  For Jackie, I persevered.
• The novel is set in Seattle, and I kept thinking how it reminded me of the Twilight series (although I have only seen the movies), mostly in the sense that moments that are supposed to be intensely emotional to the characters make me snicker.  Turns out, the author was inspired by the Twilight series.  Hmm, I guess my advice would be to get inspired by better writing next time.  Actually, I can't give the author any advice, because this trilogy is a phenomenon and is making millions for her.
• There is absolutely nothing here for guys.  Women only.  Men who want to get in touch with their feminine sides should try Steel Magnolias or even Sex in the City.  Not this.

I had an interview this morning with a potential employer, my first non-recruiter interview since I left Farmers.  It went OK from my side, but in retrospect I think the interviewer had too many reservations about my background not being a perfect fit.  It's hard to read the tea leaves.  In general, things are picking up, and several things are progressing right now, so if not this opportunity, maybe the next one.  At least it was good to go through the interview, for the practice if nothing else.