An American in Paris

An American in Paris is one of those classic films that is very well-known and respected, but I have shied away from it because it looks like the kind of song and dance musical that can feel very dated.  It stars Gene Kelly and Leslie Caron and Gershwin music. The movie ranked number 68 on the American Film Institute's list of 100 top American films released in 1998 (although it was left off the updated 2007 list), and it gets a 98% favorable rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

All of which leaves me very much in the minority position, as I really did not appreciate this film.  It has a couple of redeeming features, but it also exhibits many of the problems that older films have, and for me these overwhelm the experience.

The redeeming parts:  Gene Kelly is definitely light on his feet, able to dance all around very nicely.  Also, there are a couple of fantasy musical numbers, including a really grandiose scene at the end, that are entertaining (I'm sure the second one was considered great in its time.)

However, the film has many of the problems that plague older films.  When we first meet Gene Kelly, we look in his window to see him just waking up, looking from head to toe like he has been up for hours.  People burst into impromptu song and dance with harmonies and matching choreography.  Gene Kelly is supposedly a painter who has been in Paris for two years, but one scene implies he has never sold a painting.  How does he live?  The streets of Paris are suspiciously clean (turns out it was filmed in a studio in the US.)  The French children learn bits of English with surprisingly good accents (turns out they were American.)

But it's the love story that really comes off wrong.  Kelly meets a lovely rich American woman who wants to help him sell his art, but he isn't interested in her because, you know, what man wants to be dependent on a woman?  Instead, he meets a young French girl (Leslie Caron) and falls for her, but he comes off as more of a stalker than a man in love.  Caron is not appealing at all in this film (she's OK, barely), but the moment he meets her, he's smitten, just walking by her.  She is sitting at the table behind him, and although he is with a group, he ignores them and leans back until he catches her name.  Then he changes seats and stares right at her from about six feet away.  She is clearly uncomfortable with this (who wouldn't be?), but he qucikly gets up and asks her to dance, using her name and pretending he knows her.  She again tells him that she is uncomfortable.  He then asks for her phone number, and when she lies, her friend corrects her.  He calls anyway and is able to figure out where she works, then of course shows up there, and she finally agrees to see him.  On their first date, he sings about how their love will last forever.  All this, and the film says she is 19, while he looks at least 30-ish.  Actually Leslie Caron turned 20 in 1951, when the film was made, and Gene Kelly turned 39.  Creep.

If you like the music and the dancing, fine.  But the filmmaking is everything you wish old films were not.

24 Hours to Live

A guy named Jim Moret wrote a book called The Last Day of My Life, and my friend John Moret gave it to me to read.  The premise of the book is that Jim imagines what he would do if he had only one day left to live, then extends that to a series of life lessons.

First, I can't recommend the book.  Mr. Moret tells some decent stories, but he isn't very convincing as a life coach.  Nevertheless, I thought about the premise and decided maybe there is something to the exercise.

I don't really want to guess at exactly what I would do if I had only one day left to live, but I think, maybe, what Mr. Moret was trying to say is that we all have 24 hours to live.  OK not literally, but time is relative, we only have one shot at this, our hours are limited, and we should use them wisely.  At least he should have been trying to say that.

If I only had one day left, I probably wouldn't want to spend any of it wasting time by watching soap operas or playing solitaire or something similar.  I wouldn't want to get really drunk or pick a fight with anyone.  I would want to talk to the people I care about and spend some time with the ones who are closest.  I would want to have some fun.

Anyway, the point is, live your life well.  Do enough that you can be proud of your accomplishments in the end.  Take some time to relax.  Have fun.  Cultivate good relationships.  Love the people who are close to you.  Make the world a better place, and try to be sure that people who knew you are glad for it.

One shot.  Make it count.

Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse

These movies sucked.  Pun intended.

Finances

Waaay back in May, I wrote a post about various criteria one might use for assessing a life, and made this list:

Marriage 
Kids 
Family (everyone else) 
Friends 
Work 
Finances
Health 
Fun 
Experiences

 I have written about some things on the list, so now it looks like this:

Marriage  
Kids  
Family (everyone else)  
Friends  
Work  
Finances 
Health  
Fun 
Experiences

 So, making progress, and finances are next.

Unlike some people, I think the main goal behind getting your finances in good shape is to retire as early as possible with at least a decent income.  We will see if I feel the same when I get there, but I see not having to go to work as the ultimate luxury.  Imagine every day is Saturday.  Sleep in whenever you want.  Never commute again.  Devote the majority of every day to something you want to do.  I can't wait.

On a more serious note, I have seen a lot of couples get to their retirement years with plans to do things together, only to have something go wrong with one or both of them.  When people get into their middle sixties, they start to have serious health problems.  A lot of times, only one of them makes it that far.

My father retired on his 65th birthday; a month later he was diagnosed with colon cancer that had gotten into his liver.  He had about three more good years and a few not-so-good months after that.  My mom's health was already deteriorating by then as well, so she was not able to walk far and was limited in her activities.  I want to retire before that happens to Jackie and me.

From what I have seen, retirement planners set the bar too high, causing people to work too long and leave a bunch of money to their kids.  I usually see numbers that say you should expect to spend 70-80% of what you spend now after you retire.  Really?  There are families of four who live on half what I make.  Even though my kids will be out of the house and I will not have a mortgage, I'm going to spend 70% or more?  I wonder.

Here's a better plan:  Jackie and I will both receive social security for all the years we worked.  I have a pension -- an actual old-fashioned pension -- coming to me from my current job at Farmers.  In addition, I have equity in my house that should at least be enough to purchase another house outright, plus three 401Ks between us.  Why not just reduce our standard of living to the point that we can live on what we take in?  We live a relatively posh lifestyle currently compared to what we should need in retirement, with a smaller house, no kids, and no jobs to go to.  Without family, I just think our needs will be simpler.

In the end, we have less than financial planners think we should, and more than most people.  We'll make do.

Zombieland

I never would have thought to watch a movie called Zombieland, but I caught a few minutes of the beginning on cable last Saturday and was hooked.  It came on again that evening, and we watched it.

The basic story is not that unusual -- it's a post-apocalyptic world in which nearly everyone has become a zombie, but a few stragglers survive.  But the acting, with Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, and Emma Stone, is top-notch, the characters are quirky, and the writing is extremely clever and never lets up.

Eisenberg plays Columbus -- the characters mostly don't use their names, just places they are from -- a loner who needs to visit the bathroom frequently and has 31 rules that keep him alive.  Definitely not the Will Smith/Chuck Norris competent, ruthless type you expect to survive the zombie apocalypse.  Woody Harrelson (Tallahassee) is more the zombie-killer with a real chip on his shoulder, but he is also on a quest to find and eat the last Twinkie before they all go bad.  Emma Stone (Wichita) is a con artist still conning her way through life in Zombieland along with her little sister, Little Rock (Abigail Breslin).

All of these people are headed different directions but end up traveling together to try to find a fabled safe haven in Los Angeles.  Along the way they scam each other, fight zombies, look for Twinkies, and grudgingly get used to being together.  But what makes it work is that the movie is just different, quick-witted and fun almost all the way through.  My advice is, watch it for 20 minutes; if you like that, you'll like the rest.

There is one very different portion of the film that plays almost like an intermission.  The four main characters decide to stay in Bill Murray's mansion, and it turns out Bill Murray himself is one of the few people still alive and is living there when they show up.  Although this is remotely plausible within the parameters of the movie, it takes you away from the story for a few minutes, until Bill moves on and the movie does too.

It looks like they are planning a sequel.  Count me in.

Something For John

Don't get your hopes up for this one dude, but I have a couple more ideas queued up.  Nice picture though.

John complains that I don't blog very consistently, which is true; last post was August 7.  I tend to write when I am inspired, with no goal to entertain a readership (I don't think a smattering of infrequent readers counts as a "readership") nor to write consistently just for the discipline.

The trouble lately is that a couple of work things have dominated my thoughts, and I cannot write about work, which makes it tougher to get inspired about a writing topic.  However, the work things have smoothed out for the moment, and I took today off and have some time.

That said, I have a conundrum, one I expect will only be of interest to Joel (not John) and me.  Let us imagine a universe.  Not this one, but one that adheres to the same natural laws.  However, in this universe, there are only two objects:  a planet and an orbiting moon.  The moon orbits in a perfectly circular orbit.  The planet spins at a speed that keeps the moon geostationary, spinning once with each orbit of the moon, in the same direction.

Nothing in this universe moves in relation to anything else. However, Newton's laws tell us that there must be motion; otherwise the moon would come crashing down onto the planet.  So how would you detect the motion?  In other words, how is this system fundamentally different from another universe in which the law of gravity is suspended and the moon just hangs over the planet?

I need to remember to ask Joel.  Maybe Joel can figure it out.  At least he will appreciate the question.

Four Weddings and a Funeral

Four Weddings and a Funeral was made in 1994.  It has been around so long and is so familiar that I had a feeling I might have seen it already, but I finally was convinced that I had not, and Netflix kept recommending it, so I watched it.

I have always liked Hugh Grant as a comedic actor, and I'm also a sucker for romantic comedies, so somehow, with those good elements going for it, I think I expected to be let down by this movie.  Instead I was surprised at how much I liked it.

The story is nothing too unusual.  Boy meets girl, boy and girl are very attracted to each other, but there's a problem; otherwise the movie would be over quite quickly.  In this case, she lives in America, and he lives in England, and the second time they meet, she is engaged to someone else.

Pretty standard stuff.  What you hope for then, since the plot itself is pretty familiar, is that the humor is well written, the laugh lines are funny.  This movie delivers that and more -- the dialogue is very clever, the cast is great, the characters are delightful, and there are some more somber scenes (yes, the funeral is one) that are genuinely touching.  Through it all, Grant is at his very best, wisecracking in his understated style, and deliberately mistranslating for his deaf brother in some of the funnier moments of the film.

So just in case anyone besides me has not yet seen this film, I would definitely suggest that you do so.

Ghost World

Ghost World is billed as a comedy, and I have seen reviews that insisted that parts of it are hilarious, but I really don't remember it as being funny.  Not that it tries to be funny and fails, but it is a dark comedy, really more of a quirky drama.

One quick note:  I have never been one to grasp symbolism very well, and there is a symbol in the movie.  I don't know what the bus means.  Death? I doubt it.  The chance to leave it all behind and start a new life?  More likely, but who knows?  Not me.

This movie was made in 2001 and stars Thora Birch, Scarlett Johansson, and Steve Buscemi.  I like the cast; otherwise I doubt I would have chosen to watch this movie given the plot description.

The story is about two girls just graduating from high school.  Both are extremely cynical and oh so wise, taking note of all the shortcomings of everyone around them and rejecting any sort of ordinary trajectory for their lives.  However, Rebecca (Johansson) begins to adjust to life after high school by accepting responsibility, getting a job and an apartment, while Enid (Birch) continues to see it all as too stupid for her, and the friends begin to drift apart.  At the same time, the girls play a joke on a man who posts in the want ads (Buscemi), and Enid finds herself involved with this much older man who, like her, finds other people strange and hard to relate to.

If I were a teenage girl, I would have probably liked this movie better.  As it is, it's not a bad movie, but there's not enough there for me to recommend it.

Gloomy Sunday

Much like Black Book, which I wrote about a few posts back, Gloomy Sunday is a European foreign-language film about Nazi occupation.  The same actor even plays a German officer in each film, although he is less prominent in this one.  This time the occupied country is Hungary (the story takes place in Budapest) and the language is German.  The original title, which you can see to the left, translates to A Song of Love and Death.

There is a song, and the song is one unavoidable, though slight, flaw in a generally entertaining movie.  The song is called Gloomy Sunday, this time a true translation of the German title.  When this song is played, people stop what they are doing and are entranced.  The sadness of the music affects them; numerous people supposedly hear the song on the radio and commit suicide while it plays.  The problem is, we hear the song, and while it's pretty... I just think you have to suspend your disbelief a bit to accept that, to the people in the movie at least, it is incredibly powerful.

Ok, disbelief suspended, and we can enjoy our film.  It is the story of two men and a woman.  Laszlo is the Jewish owner of a restaurant in Budapest before the Nazis rise to prominence.  Ilona is his beautiful waitress and lover.  He hires Andras to play piano in his restaurant, and it is Andras who writes the soon-to-be famous song, and who also becomes Ilona's lover.  But it's not that kind of tragic love triangle; the three of them seem like they will make it work just fine.

The trouble comes with a third admirer of Ilona, a German customer named Wieck, on holiday, who later returns as a Colonel in the occupying army, and Laszlo's Jewishness becomes a problem.  Although Colonel Wieck sees Laszlo as a friend based on their prior acquaintance (Laszlo actually saves his life) and tries to help him, his friendship only goes so far.  Despite having some influence with Wieck, Laszlo finds himself ever closer to being rounded up and sent away with the other Hungarian Jews.

The film works because we learn enough about these characters to care about them and feel their pain as they try to save Laszlo from "going up the chimney," as Herr Wieck so delicately puts it.  And beyond that, I would only recommend that you see the movie.

The Station Agent

As I was watching The Station Agent, I was thinking that anyone with talent could have made this movie.  It doesn't contain any special effects, explosions, or car chases, and the filiming was done in places that anyone could access.  There isn't much of a plot, and there really isn't any ending.  Yet I thoroughly enjoyed it.

What does happen is that a guy named Finbar, or Fin, who happens to be 4'5" tall, moves out of the city and into an abandoned train depot that his friend left him in his will.  Fin wants to get away from people, but very near his train depot is a hotdog and coffee truck run by a guy named Joe, who talks all the time and tries very hard to engage Fin.

Fin resists at first, but in time he begins to appreciate the contact, and he also crosses paths with a few other locals:  an artist still mourning the loss of her son, a schoolgirl who lives close, and a young lady who works in the library.

And really, that's it, and then the movie ends.  We see Fin go from shunning all attention to appreciating a few friends, and not much more.  But it's a good story scene by scene, and it kept me engaged all the way through.  It's surprising what someone with talent and a camera can do.

And if you see this movie, you should stick through the credits to hear the theremin playing the last song, if you like that sort of thing.

The Aristocrats

The Aristocrats is a movie about a single joke.  About 100 comics talk about and tell this one joke, which is something of a legendary joke among comedians.

So the first thing you should know is that the joke is not very funny, and neither is the movie.  That doesn't mean it's a bad movie, but just don't get it because you think you will bust a gut laughing.  You won't, or at least I didn't.

Here's the joke:  A guy walks into a talent agents's office and says, "Have I got an act for you!"  He then describes a shockingly horrific act that may involve incest, bestiality, scatology, cruelty to children -- almost anything as long as it's shocking.  The talent agent finally asks, "So what do you call yourselves?"  And the guy says, "The Aristocrats!"

There are a few funny takes on the joke.  A couple of comics turn the joke around, describing a sophisticated act with a vulgar name.  Several of the comics won't tell the joke but tell a different one.  There are some funny moments in the film; for me, the biggest laugh came when Robin Williams and another comic told a different joke, a good one.

The joke does not have to be dirty; one of the funnier versions of it in the film is very clean.  However, most of the comics see it as a chance to be as outrageous as possible in describing the act, sometimes going on and on.  And that is where the film gets somewhat tedious, as hearing comics try to outdo each other by saying something more disgusting or inappropriate than the last person isn't particularly funny.

The more interesting part of the movie is hearing the comedians talk about the joke.  They describe it like a jazz standard; you have the basic setup, but exactly how it gets told is up to the joke teller.  You can make up the act as you go, try to get as disgusting as you can, drag it out ten minutes.  It might have a different feel for a woman comic or a black comic or a gay comic.

The film has a definite low point.  For a couple of minutes, Sarah Silverman puts on one or the most pathetic, cringe-worthy, unfunny performances ever seen.  No matter how good your mood, she will kill it for a brief while.  The rest of the film stands out as brilliant by comparison, but anything would.

In the end, I can't quite give this one a thumbs up.  Comics talking about comedy is interesting, but there are a few too many lame attempts to tell a mediocre joke.

American Movie

It is not likely anyone will ever make a documentary about my life.  My life is just way too ordinary.  If you are going to make a documentary about someone, it probably helps if they are quite strange, because that makes them interesting.  American Movie is a documentary about a very unusual guy.

American Movie is also very much a film about failure.  Mark Borchardt calls himself a filmmaker, but he has never actually made any films.  What he really is -- no offense dude -- is a loser, deep in debt and marginally employed, with no education.  He can't stand the idea of a normal job or being like everyone else, and he has wanted to make films from the time he was 14.

At the beginning of American Movie, Borchardt is going to make a full-length movie called Northwestern.  This is not a Hollywood movie, but rather a super-low-budget independent film to be written, directed, and produced by Mark Borchardt.  Since Borchardt is broke and owes money to everybody including the IRS, even the super low budget seems beyond his reach.

Borchardt assembles a fairly large filmmaking crew from local talent, but they quickly abandon him when it becomes apparent that the film isn't going anywhere.  It turns out that Mark has been making this film for six years, but he has never completed it.  When it becomes clear to him that he cannot make the film without some money, he decides to complete another film he has been working on for three years, a short black-and-white horror film called Coven.  Incredibly, Coven is pronounced with a long O:  Coe-ven.  Someone tells him how to pronounce the word, but he just says that sounds wrong, it has to be Coe-ven.  The idea is to finish Coven and sell enough copies to raise the money to make Northwestern.

American Movie is also about friendship.  Mark's friends don't seem like the most reliable lot, but they stick with him and help him make his movies, because that what he wants to do.  Mark himself is up and down, energetic and manic about working on his films, then depressed and questioning his own sanity, trying to analyze his own inability to complete his work.

The movie has a bit of a happy ending, as Coven gets completed and shows in the local theater.  According to Wikipedia, Borchardt eventually sold over 5,000 copies of the film (his goal was 3,000), although I'm sure American Movie helped, as they actually tell you how to buy Coven at the end.  According to IMDB, Northwestern was never completed, and Borchardt is working on another film that was supposed to be released in 2005, but is still not complete.  However, IMDB also shows Borchardt with 22 acting credits, 3 as a writer, 3 as producer, 2 as director, 2 as editor, and 1 as cinematographer.  Most of those are in his own films, but some of the acting credits are in actual commercial films.  It doesn't look like he has that much of a career, but this is a guy with a definite dream to make movies, and it seems he has at least been able to live the dream a little.

I suppose I should add, I loved this movie.

Working

It's easy enough to talk trash about our jobs, and we all do it to various degrees.  However, when you look at your accomplishments in life, the work you do is a big piece.  It's the thing that pays for your stay on this planet, and maybe part of some other people's.  It is also a big investment of time and effort for most people, and if you are going to spend that much time doing something, it might not hurt to make the most of it and maybe be proud of your results.

My career hasn't always been the most stellar.  Like a lot of young people, I kicked around for awhile trying to figure out what I was going to do, but I kept doing that into my thirties.  Then I started making a career out of accounting, but I kept changing jobs every few years.

Finally I ended up at Farmers, and I have been there ten years.  I am a first line manager in financial reporting.  Not exactly a dream job -- literally no one anywhere ever dreams of getting this job -- but it's not all that bad either.  When I start feeling like I haven't accomplished all that much, I like to think how the other people in the building would feel if they could do what I do.  For maybe 100 or so of the 600 who work with me, it would be a step down.  For most of the other 500, it would be a step up; for the majority of them it is well beyond anything they could ever hope to reach.  The thing is, it's really a pretty good position, and I'm sort of pleased that I made it this far.

Day of the Jackal

Red wine and a movie review.  This could be a nice tradition.

I noticed that even though both Miller's Crossing and Day of the Jackal have 90% good reviews on Rotten Tomatoes, Vincent Canby of The New York Times gave negative reviews to both.  I'm going to have to start paying more attention to Mr. Canby.

Day of the Jackal is a 1973 movie based on a Frederick Forsyth novel.  I have read at least one Forsyth book.  He is a Robert Ludlum type of writer -- major international intrigue, with lots of detail about how the espionage business works behind the scenes.  This story takes place in France, as a hired killer -- the Jackal -- tries to kill Charles de Gaulle, and French security tries to stop him.

The movie isn't too bad, but I can't really recommend it either.  The first part is slow, as the Jackal makes his preparations and then French intelligence gets wind of the plot and tries to find him.  As the Jackal prepared a new ID, had a special gun made, made plans to change his appearance, etc., it all reminded me of a business project -- very detailed and meticulous, but with no sense of malice.  Meanwhile the efforts by French intelligence feel like a police procedural.  It's probably more realistic than a white-knuckle, Bourne Identity (a Ludlum book) scenario, but it didn't have me engaged until halfway through.

The Jackal never really feels all that threatening, even though he kills a few people and seems very businesslike about it.  I kept thinking about Javier Bardem in No Country for Old Men -- particularly after one scene in which the Jackal is injured in an accident but limps away and stays on task --  and how truly evil he felt.  Somehow the Jackal just never rose to that level of menace.

Maybe it was the ascots.  He wore a series of brightly-colored ascots around his neck.  Was that ever a popular thing to do?  It must be difficult to look scary in ascots, but then Bardem managed it even with that bad haircut.

Part way through, the chase gets more tense, and the movie becomes enjoyable enough.  Still, it feels a lot like two men doing their jobs, one with the job of killing de Gaulle, and the other with the job of stopping him, and we get to see in detail how they go about it.  A well-crafted tale, but not one that will keep you on the edge of your seat.

Friends

No, not the TV show.  This post is about friends in my life.  My TV show, pictured over there on the left, just got cancelled by the way.

"Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you." - Elbert Hubard.  That quote would be a little better if it weren't so gender-specific, but still.

It is easy enough to find information on the Internet that tells us that relationships are the biggest key to happiness.  So what about someone who is a fairly strong introvert?  Well, the great book of collected wisdom also tells us that introverts (a group that definitely includes me) still want relationships, but it's the quality of those relationships that matters, not the quantity.

There have been times in my life when I had a lot of friends, actually.  Those times are easy to identify -- high school and college (at Berkeley.)  Elementary school and middle school too, if you want to go back that far.  It's easy to meet people when you are in the same classes with them day after day for years, or when you live on the same dorm floor with them.

However, since Berkeley, which I left when I was 19, I don't think I could ever say that I had very many friends.  Sometimes I have enjoyed a small circle of friends at work, but as I have moved from one job to another, I have lost them.  I've never been good about keeping in touch.  Other times, I have gone for long periods with few or even no real friends and have only stayed close to family members.  I can't say I'm really proud of that record; I should have done more to cultivate relationships and to keep the ones I had.

The good side of that is that now is one of the times that I have a few close friends that I really enjoy.  For the first time in my life, I have worked at the same company for more than four years -- ten in fact -- and I have eaten lunch every day with some of the same people for the last six years.  We don't do much outside of work, but we go out to lunch on occasion and at least acknowledge birthdays, and we know each other well by now.  I also keep in touch with one retiree who used to eat with us, and I enjoy the coworkers I carpool with.  That may not seem like a big batch of friends, and it isn't.  But trust me, it's a very high-quality group.

Black Book

Black Book is a film directed by Paul Verhoeven, who directed, among other things, Robocop, Total Recall, Basic Instinct, and the immortal Showgirls.  This film is in Dutch (Zwartboek is the untranslated title), and it is based on the true story of a Jewish woman in World War II who adopted a non-Jewish identity and spied on the Nazis by sleeping with them.

I have to point out here that, right at the beginning of the disk, there is a screen saying that the film is rated R, in part for "graphic nudity," and my first thought was that I was meant to be European.  Not British -- they seem so silly sometimes, but Dutch would be fine, or French or German.  Europeans can just be so much more adult about nudity, sex, drugs, taxes, social welfare, workers rights, helping each other, taking long lunches...  I think I will have some more wine.

Ok, glass of wine (red) at hand.  In the last half hour I have had a man at he door looking for the girl next door and a call from a guy looking for Kim.  Anyway, I thought Black Book was very entertaining.  It's a suspenseful story with a fairly involved plot that includes trying to identify a mole within the Dutch resistance, and there are several twists to the story, but it is never hard to follow or believe, and it always kept me engaged.  The morality of the characters, even the heroine, is not as clear cut as you might expect from a movie about fighting Nazis, and I think that adds something to the film.

So I would recommend this one to people who enjoy foreign films.  As for the nudity, yes there is some, but nothing a good European would think twice about.

Family

My closest family would be my wife and the boys; however, this post is not about them, as I have already written about marriage and children.  This would be about other family, primarily my siblings, with maybe a few others thrown in.

One of the strongest forces that influences my relationship with my siblings is the memory of my mother's desire that we should always remain a family.  It was important to her that her children retain some connection to each other, and it was a big reason why she wanted us to keep getting together at Christmas even after we were older, some of us had moved away, and my father was gone.  As a parent, I can understand the desire, but I also see how even brothers and sisters can drift apart as they grow older and move away.  My siblings and I have always kept in touch at least on occasion, and I think we would help each other if the need arose.  My sister from Oregon has visited several times, and we travel her way as well.  We are not all as close as we once were, but the bond is still there.  In addition, my brother and I, who were the two oldest, remain very close and always will.

Since I did not grow up with cousins and aunts and uncles much, I don't have a big extended family.  I hear from two neices and a nephew on Facebook, including many IM sessions with my nephew, and I'm glad to keep in touch with them.  I knew them well when I lived in California and they were very young, but we didn't communicate much for awhile after I moved to Washington, until Facebook came along.

One group I do not see as often as I would like is my in-laws.  I used to go to Oklahoma every year or two with Jackie and the boys, but as the boys got older it became easier for Jackie to go without me, and that has become the norm.  Her father and grandmother are both ill, and her niece had a baby in the last year or two, but I have only been back once in the last five years, so I feel a bit out of touch.  I get all my news of them second-hand from Jackie.

Looking at those paragraphs, it doesn't seem like there is a lot of family interaction going on.  We don't all get together anymore for family vacations or even for holidays.  We have never staged a family reunion.  Nevertheless I'm happy that we have stayed in touch and on good terms.  I'm not sure if Mom would have thought it was enough, but then, she was always hard to please.

At the Movies

I have about 20 movies in the queue to watch while Jackie is away, so I think I'll write reviews.  Most of the movies are either old movies or foreign.  Tonight I watched Miller's Crossing.

Miller's Crossing is a classic Coen Brothers movie from 1990, starring Gabriel Byrne, whom I like, and it has a 90% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, so all very promising.

I didn't care for it much.  The main character, Tom Reagan (played by Byrne), gets beat up several times during the movie, sometimes badly, and is nearly killed several more times.  That happens in movies, i.e. James Bond, but generally the person facing all this danger has some purpose in mind that makes it all worth the risk.  It's never clear, even at the end, what Reagan is getting for all the danger he faces.  You never get the feeling that he has any real purpose in mind.

Reagan is a brooding, self-assured guy, who is supposed to be the brains of a mob operation, right-hand man to the boss.  But his plans don't seem all that bright, and he doesn't have any reason to be so sure of himself given all trouble he gets into.  In the end, he's lucky to be alive, probably will suffer chronic health problems from all the beatings he has taken, and gets nothing out of it.

It all comes off as very stylish, with some very memorable scenes and a number of good actors, but the plot doesn't really hold together.  I have heard about this movie for years, always wanted to see it, but I wasn't impressed.

Kids

"The most important task of each generation is raising the next one."  George Will

Actually, I am paraphrasing Mr. Will from memory, but he said something like that, and I liked it.

Kids certainly give some meaning to life -- the ability to give someone else the chances you had, and maybe steer them clear of some of the mistakes you made, is a worthy task for anyone.  Children also provide some sense of immortality.  After I am gone, my children will live on, and their children, and maybe the world will be a little bit better because of that, and my life will not necessarily be inconsequential in 100 years, or so I hope.

I feel comfortable saying that Jackie and I have put a tremendous effort into raising our kids to be everything they can be.  You can always point to something that could be better, but we have lived our lives centered around them for 16 years now, and  we will continue to do so for several years to come.  They have consumed our time and financial resources, impacted decisions about where we would live, what kinds of cars we have, what jobs we took.

And that's pretty much the deal when you have kids; you don't put everything else on hold, but they become your focus, and you sacrifice your own desires for their needs.  In return, you get to watch them grow up, and you help shape their lives.  It's an accomplishment raising children, one worth being proud of.

Jackie and I have done our best to give the boys numerous opportunities.  We homeschooled them because we thought it was good for their education, but also because it seemed like a much better experience for them than being bused off to a classroom every day.  They have owned hundreds of books, videos, video games, toys, board games.  We got them involved in Boy Scouts, drama, archery, chess, music, social groups, church, and more.  They have gone to camps and gone with us on vacations across the country and beyond a few times.  We have given them chances to develop as well as opportunities to find and pursue their own interests.

As for the boys, they seem to be doing well.  Lucas is a top student, with a grade point average well over 3.9 in his online high school courses.  He is also a good archer and will compete in the outdoor national championships next week, and he is well on his way to becoming an Eagle Scout.  Lucas seems to do well at everything he puts his mind to.

Jarrod is a bit of a different animal, but he also tests well, particularly in language skills.  He will surprise you with very sophisticated questions.  He loves drama and does well at it.  He is outgoing and easily makes friends and likes to be the center of attention.  Jarrod likes to cook sometimes, and will add his own touch to things he makes.  Looking at that list, I have to say he is almost the complete opposite of me.  We still sometimes wonder where he came from, but he's a very good kid.

So this is the one area of my life that I can say I am most proud of.  You never know what will happen, but for now I will say that we have made a respectable effort to raise our kids well, and the results are worth the effort.

Pushing My Luck

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.  ~Doug Larson

This post is another in a series of posts about my life so far.  When I wrote the original post on May 24, I wrote that I would create a series of posts over the next week or two.  This is actually only the second of nine subjects I want to address; I guess there are too many other things to do.

Anyway, for topic number two I am jumping down the list to discuss health.  The reason for this is that health is one area where I do very poorly, and I hope this will help keep my reflections on my life from sounding like a series of pats on my own back.

In some sense, I have lived a fairly healthy life.  I had a major infection that landed me in the hospital for a week when I was 34, but I fully recovered.  I had thyroid cancer a couple of years ago, but although that involved some surgery and un-fun treatment, it is not much of a threat to my health long-term.  I have slightly high blood pressure.  I have used a CPAP machine for 15 years now.  Still, I am in reasonably good health, with no chronic issues to concern me for now.

The problem is that I am at great risk if I don't lose weight and get in better shape.  I am more or less 100 pounds overweight, and I hardly exercise or do anything active at all.  It is fortunate that I don't already have diabetes, as I have a family history.  I am also a great candidate for a heart attack someday, and there are a number of other potential problems with obesity.

Being in really bad shape impacts your life in other ways too.  I haven't taken part in sports of any kind in years.  I can't accompany my kids on most scouting activities, because they are too strenuous for me.  My ability to go on hikes in all the mountains I live near, or just to go for a bike ride, is limited.

So I know that I need to exercise more and to lose weight, but I never do.  I have been lucky so far, but if I'm evaluating my accomplishments, this is not an area I'm proud of.

Wasting Time

My carpool buddy Joel is an INTP personality type, same as me.  We talk a lot -- really a lot compared to "normal" people -- about various theoretical things that come into our heads either from external sources or just our own thoughts.

Joel read something recently about the class structure in the United States.  The theory is very controversial, but the gist of it is this:  Some people use any money they get right away for something they want now and similarly use the time they have available to do something that gives them pleasure right now; other people save their money for something they want later and spend their time doing things that will pay benefits later.  According to this article, these traits separate the classes.  The first group is lower class, and the second is the upper class.

Now I should point out that I'm not sure if all that is a very accurate portrayal of the article or even of what Joel told me, because I have not read the article myself but am rather going by my memory of a conversation about it.  But that doesn't matter.  What matters is that I think it's interesting.

And looking at myself, I would say that I belong half in the first category, and half in the second.  I am naturally inclined to save money, and I have set aside a fair amount for what I hope will be a slightly early retirement.  I always had enough money to live on when I was single, with some left over.  However, I tend to spend my time unwisely, doing fun or time-wasting things first and postponing less enjoyable activities as long as possible.

This approach leads to a host of problems:  bad grades in school, bills paid late, things around the house not done, inefficiency at work.  It is also directly related to why I have trouble losing weight and exercising.  Instant gratification is the key element; for example, exercise and dieting will lead to desired results down the road, but right now they are not much fun.  But I really think that I could do better in my life if I treated my time more like I treat my money.

Of course, the truth is that it's all about instant gratification.  I feel good about having money the moment it's in the bank; I don't have to wait until I spend it on a vacation.  So maybe the trick is to find a way to feel just as good right away about eating better, exercising, or doing things around the house.

To help me with this quest I have Jackie, whom I would judge to be my opposite both in terms of time and money.  She clearly doesn't get the pleasure that I do from saving money -- really doesn't even understand why I do -- but she likes to spend time productively up front so that she can relax later.  I have shared my thoughts about my own tendencies with her, and she tries to help.

So this weekend I made some small strides, mainly working on Boy Scout treasury stuff yesterday and this morning so that I don't have to do it all tonight.  This is a change from my usual ways.  Now, I think I will go use the treadmill.  Eating has not gone so well, but then I have never been one for dramatic changes.  Baby steps.

You Don't Want Leaders

"Most of the ladies and gentlemen who mourn the passing of the nation's leaders wouldn't know a leader if they saw one. If they had the bad luck to come across a leader, they would find out that he might demand something from them, and this impertinence would put an abrupt and indignant end to their wish for his return."  Lewis Lapham

Companies talk a lot about leadership and wanting leaders.  Managers need to be leaders, setting the example for others.  Leadership training, leadership skills, blah blah blah.

But so often what they really want from managers, what they need to keep the organization running, is for managers to support the latest initiative that comes from top management, and sell it to other employees, and carry it out as efficiently as possible.  That way everyone pulls in the same direction, pursuing the same goals.  That's the leadership they want.

follower -n:  an enthusiast or supporter, as of a sport or team

What top mangement wants isn't leadership; they want followers.  They need people who will enthusiastically support the latest initiative that comes from someone else and encourage others to support it too.  They need cheerleaders.  There are always people who are willing to jump in and organize something, anything, with irritating amounts of energy and an apparently earnest belief in whatever comes along.  They have always baffled me.  But big companies love those people.  The people at the top of the organization want to be the leaders, and leaders need followers.  They can't afford to have too many leaders in the organization.  Real leaders might question their projects, express doubts, try to go in another direction and take others with them.  Real leaders would create havoc.

I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

Just call me a manager.  A guy who accepts a set of tasks and initiatives and organizes people to accomplish them.  That's what you pay me to do.  You don't want me to lead.

Biggest Loser, Last Weigh-In

I will skip the biggest loser weigh-in today, as I have for the last few weeks, because I have gained about 7 pounds during the contest, and I can't drag my teammates down by including my weight in their totals.

I haven't exactly given up, but this is as close to complete failure as I can imagine.  I have a pretty good idea how to lose weight, and it's enormously (ha ha) important to me to do this, but I can't bring myself to do what is best for me.  It's a very helpless feeling, not being able to exercise control over what should be your own choices.  This must be something like what addiction feels like.

Today I ate protein for breakfast, brought fruit and veggies for lunch.  Every day is a chance to start over.

In case anyone wonders, that guy in the picture is not me.  I don't have a moustache.

Tahiti Update - Done!

• Took about 14 weeks.  I started April 3.
• 4,000 pieces exactly, 80 by 50.
• Final puzzle is 3 feet by 4.5 feet.
• Jackie and Jarrod might have put 20 pieces or less together.  I did the rest.
• When I started, I put the pieces all over the main table and six different sorting trays.
• I was missing one piece, in the leaves of the short tree to the left of the tallest tree.  After I assembled the other 3,999 pieces, I searched for that one and found it, so that was officially the last piece.
• This was a pretty fun project.  Jackie bought me the puzzle and two "puzzle caddies" many years ago.  The puzzle caddies were the source for the space I built the puzzle on and all the sorting trays.  Nice presents Sweetheart!
• Now I need another way to waste large amounts of time.

On Marriage

My friend John pointed me to the work of Erik Erikson, a psychologist who broke development into stages based on our experiences as we age.  My current stage is middle adulthood (rapidly approaching late adulthood), where my concerns would be centered on the value of my contributions.  This seems about right to me -- I think that's what I'm doing in my blog right now.

In my previous post I listed some of the things that make a difference in life.  So now, starting with this post, I will do what I can to evaluate my own efforts.  First item on my list was marriage.

Marriage is a complicated arrangement.  It usually starts with romantic attraction, but then it becomes so much more:  working out the finances, raising kids, running a household, deciding where to live, making it all work.  All the while you have to get along with someone who is part of your life every hour of every day, every year, forever.  Most days it's easy, or better than easy.  Most days it's great to have someone to talk to and share with.  But not every day, and not every part of every day.  Certainly it isn't automatic that any marriage will last, so it is a real accomplishment to stay together and make it work.

My family has been fortunate when it comes to marriages.  My parents were married 45 years.  Two of my siblings have been married more than 25 years each.  No divorces.  I come with an expectation that once you get married, you stay married.

Jackie and I will celebrate our 17th anniversary next month.  It's a lot of time together.  We have had two kids, three pets, and about 7 jobs; homeschooled the boys; lived in six different places in two states.  Through it all we have worked together, doing our own things, but moving forward with a common purpose.  We complement each other in many ways.  I make a good wage and make sure we put away some money for retirement.  Jackie takes care of pretty much everything else.  She is more organized and industrious.  She sets higher standards for all of us than I ever would.  She takes care of the boys, from appointments to activities to homeschooling.  She tries, with little success, to help me be more organized and industrious.

Going forward, Jackie and I have a plan.  The plan is this:  raise the kids, then retire and travel.  We plan to do this together.  I'm pretty pleased that we have stayed together so long and plan to stay together.  I don't think that having a long marriage is a great achievement because you should stick in a marriage no matter what; I think it's an achievement because it's a good sign you are doing something right.

What Do You Want From Life?

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation, and go to the grave with the song still in them.”  Thoreau

I often think about how my life has turned out, the way things have gone, and whether I should be content with it.  I think that generally I am content, but it's so easy to adjust to the way things are and tell yourself that it's OK, because the alternative is to be miserable.  Then there are some days when I am not very happy with anything, and the above quote seems to fit.
 
So when I consider this subject, I tend to break life down into the things that matter, then evaluate my own success, or lack of success, in those areas.  The first step then, is to figure out what is important.  I don't suppose I would necessarily make the same list every time, but it looks something like this:

• Marriage
• Kids
• Family (everyone else)
• Friends
• Work
• Finances
• Health
• Fun
• Experiences

I have more to say about some of those topics than others, but I will try to write a series of posts addressing each one over the next week or two.

Tahiti Update

I posted on Facebook on April 3 that I was starting this puzzle.  Now it's May 16, and I have assembled all of the pieces except the ones that are 100% blue sky, maybe 2/3 of the puzzle complete.  Now comes the hard part.  The bottom part of the sky is much lighter, and I can us color to stratify the pieces to some extent; however, the very top is made of hundreds of quite dark blue pieces, hard to distinguish.  As you can see, I can't even figure out how the border goes together yet.

Still, I'm pretty pleased with my progress.  Just 1,300 or so blue pieces to go.

All Seven Continents

Hmm, might as well start with this:  I doubt that I will make it to Antarctica.  There are cruises that go there, but you really have to make a special trip, and it wouldn't be cheap.  We'll see.

A friend at work has actually visited all of the continents after making the trip to Antarctica last year.  She is not 40 yet, and she has taken so many trips all around the world that she is starting to feel a bit limited regarding new places to go.  I would love to be in that position one day, although I will never catch up with her.

I have already vistied three continents.  I went to Brazil the year I turned 17 and visited Iguaçu Falls and Rio de Janeiro.  I have also visited Europe several times, so that leaves Asia, Africa, Australia, and maybe Antarctica.  All the ones that start and end with "A."

Australia will have to be its own trip.  My parents talked about going to New Zealand, but never made it; it would be fun to stop there as well.

The easy way to see Asia and Africa both would be to take a Mediterranean cruise that stops at Israel and Egypt; however, although I know the Middle East is technically in Asia, I think I would feel like that didn't really count.  I would want to go somewhere more...Asian.  China seems to me about as Asian as you can get, but Japan, Southeast Asia, or even India would probably do.

On the other hand, I would be happy with almost anywhere in Africa.  Egypt, Morocco, South Africa will work.  Still, the "most" African experiences would be to see the wildlife or to visit sub-Saharan non-South-African Africa.  Mount Kilimajaro would be something to shoot for.

All that probably doesn't start until I retire, and only then if we have the money.  Right now, it's all within the realm of possibility, even Antarctica, and it's good to have something to look forward to.

Wednesday Weigh-In

I decided that every other week is sufficient for posting about weight.  I have lost six pounds in four weeks, losing a bit each week.  Not bad.

What is bad is that I am falling into an old Biggest Loser pattern of eating whatever and gaining weight through Sunday, then desperately trying to lose weight Monday and Tuesday to beat the Wednesday weigh-in.  I thought this week would be impossible, but I lost about five pounds in the last two days.

It would be nice to get to a Monday and actually be lighter than the previous Wednesday.

All 50 States

One of my goals has long been to travel as much as I can.  When I was a kid my family traveled quite a bit, mostly within the U.S., Canada and Mexico.  We took a lot of road trips and covered large portions of the country.  I was also fortunate enough to visit Brazil for a month when I was 16, and in my twenties, I travelled to Europe three times and spent six months there total.  Travel dropped off after that, but now I am looking at retirement as a time to start catching up.

I have some ideas of what I want to see, and one goal is to visit all 50 states before I die (after that, there's not much point.)  My dad had the same goal and managed it; it's something to shoot for.  My family has also gotten used to taking road trips, and I think there is enough to see everywhere that we should be able to find something to visit in any state, so it won't be a chore to go to each one just to say I have; instead, it's a way of finding things to see and do.

My rule for counting a state:  I have to actually go there to do something, not just drive through or stay in a motel or stop to eat, which is too bad because it means I have to go back to Mississippi, Arkansas, and Tennessee with some destination in mind.  Airports don't count either, which means I can't count New York yet.

Where have I already been?  I have lived in

• Ohio
• California
• Texas
• Washington

I have visited multiple times

• Indiana
• Florida
• Oklahoma
• Oregon
• Nevada
• Arizona

That's 10.  On our Lewis and Clark trip several years ago I went to

• Idaho
• Montana
• North Dakota (good to get that one checked off)
• South Dakota
• Nebraska
• Iowa

Several states I went to for miscellaneous reasons

• Alaska (Cruise, another good one to check off)
• Kansas (work)
• Illinois (work)
• New Mexico (Shiprock)
• Colorado (Dinosaur National Monument)
• Utah (Monument Valley)
• Louisiana (Gambling with Jackie)
• Wyoming (Devil's Tower)
• Missouri (Saw the arch when they were building it, 1966)
• Alabama (Jackie's cousin Marley's wedding)
• Georgia (Visited my cousins in 1971)

I feel like I have been all over the country, but the western states are big, so that's just 27 I have seen, with 23 to go.  Hawaii will require a special trip.  We are hoping to take a trip through Minnesota and Wisconsin to visit the town of Stambaugh, Michigan this year, which will knock off three more states that are off by themselves.  All of the other 19 states are contiguous, with Arkansas being the westernmost.  Jackie and I have a plan to drive all the way across the country on I-90 after I retire, which will take us to New England, and if we plan the trip back carefully enough, we could hit all those East Coast and southern states I haven't seen.  We'll throw in D.C. for good measure.

So I have a plan that seems realistic.  That's the U.S.  Next ambition:  the world.

Biggest Loser update

Down 1.1 pounds this week.  Small breakfast, small lunch, keep the carbs down at dinner.  Some meals are harder than other, like when we had cheesecake for dessert, or spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner.

Going in the right direction, and I haven't had to take off my shoes to cheat the weigh-in yet.

12 Years Old

My youngest son, Jarrod, just turned 12, and it is making me think about how close we are to the end stage of raising the boys.

Twelve meant seventh grade for me, and seventh grade was the year we started middle school.  It was also the year that we began to have dances, and people started pairing off with the opposite sex, even if it was still mostly pretty tame.  The guys started to get a lot taller, and the girls started to get curves.  Twelve isn't a little kid anymore.

Jarrod is already as tall as his mom.  He takes more interest in girls and sexual topics than his brother ever did.  The other night, he started telling me about the history of condoms.  Apparently the first ones were used in the 1500s and were made of linen.  It makes me wonder how many of us owe our existence to failed linen condoms.

I don't have any regrets for now that the boys are approaching the time when they will move on.  Raising kids is a project, the project of a lifetime, and every step in their progress is a part of the project.  I'm sure I will miss them one day, but right now they seem like they are just where they are supposed to be.

Biggest Loser Update

Each Wednesday, I have an official weigh-in at work for our biggest loser contest, so Wednesdays are the best day for weight updates.

So far, since making my commitment to lose 50 pounds, I have really done nothing to lose weight.  No exercise, and I have not eaten better.  I have light lunches at work, but I make up for it when I get home.  I have stuffed myself on pizza, nibbled on snacks, eaten too much peanut butter.

My scale at home says I lost 0.8 pounds this week.  For the Biggest Loser contest, I lost 3.1 pounds since last Wednesday.  The difference is smoke and mirrors -- eat a light breakfast, and don't drink anything until you weigh in.  I still have a couple of tricks left; I can take off my shoes and empty my pockets.  After that, I will actually have to lose weight.

First, Cheesecake Factory tonight to celebrate Jarrod's birthday.  Then I'll get serious.

Words Into Action Update

I noticed that in my original post on losing weight, I wrote that I would post weekly updates. Monday is generally not a good day for me to post about my weight, because I eat poorly on weekends, but maybe that makes it a good day to motivate me.

I just weighed myself on the scale downstairs here at work. That scale is very accurate and repeatable. It says that I have lost 2.8 pounds versus last Wednesday. That sounds pretty good, but it really is not, because I have not been following my own diet guidelines at all. Last night we celebrated Jarrod's birthday with pizza and ice-cream cake. Still, I'm down, and I have a good lunch for today, so not a bad start.

Somewhere Greener, Somewhere Warmer

Heads Carolina, tails California, somewhere greener, somewhere warmer.

Jo Dee Messina

It's a little early to think about retirement, but that doesn't stop me. Today's post is about the search for a suitable place to retire. Using the process of elimination, let's see if we can zero in on an approximate location.

The most obvious place to think about right away is right where we are now, and I have to admit it's a possibility. The Seattle area is very pretty, and we already have friends here. There is a decent chance the boys will still be here when we are ready to retire, and we may want to be near them. On the other hand, we have already been here for a long time, and the weather is not so great. We got hail and snow today. Retirement might be a good time to try somewhere else.

Next we can eliminate a few places. Some other country? I doubt it; Jackie and I have lots of ties to the United States, obviously, and we won't have the means to just hop a plane every few months to come back and visit. We can't afford anyplace very expensive, so that rules out Hawaii and California. Snow states are out; if it regularly gets below zero, we'd be better off staying in Washington. Cross off Montana, Minnesota, Ohio, Illinois, Alaska and others.

I'm not a big fan of the South. People there are nuts. Something like half of all Southerners think Barack Obama was born in another country. I don't want to live with that many loons. We want to live close to an urban area. Places like Kansas and Arkansas seem a bit remote. The East Coast might be possible, but it is far from Jackie's family and farther from mine.

Somewhere greener, somewhere warmer. Actually, Western Washington is about as green as it gets. But somewhere warmer. Florida is too humid. Texas is full of Texans.

So I see us moving to the Southwest -- Arizona, New Mexico, Colorado, Nevada. Lots of sun, lots of retirement communities, some big cities, not too expensive. In between Jackie's family in Oklahoma and Texas and my family in California, Oregon, and maybe Washington if the boys are here. Not exactly original, but people retire to Arizona for good reasons.

The picture above is a beach in Florida. If I had shown a cactus, it would have given away the ending.

The Next Not-Quite-The-Top Chef

I have a new goal to pursue: Learning how to cook. Not necessarily to be the next Top Chef, but just to fix dinners for the family, plus maybe the occasional breakfast or lunch on weekends.

My family has gotten away from having dinners together as often as we would like. This has happened largely because the boys have many activities that keep them away from the house evenings. Both boys have archery and Boy Scouts on Monday and archery on Wednesday. Lucas is in a strategic gaming group every other Thursday, and he goes to archery again on Friday. Most of these nights, we each find food for ourselves; the boys usually eat some frozen item, like a Costco chicken bake, and Jackie and I scrounge up whatever we can find.

However, we have gotten in the habit of doing the same thing on nights when we are home, and that isn't really what we wanted. We like having some time together, and the boys need to eat healthy food on occasion. However, neither Jackie nor I really wants to take on the cooking task.

OK, honestly, Jackie is tired of it. She never wanted to be the cook, but she has been by default for many years, because I have not been. She doesn't want to do it anymore. It's not that I mind cooking; it's just that I work, so it's hard for me to find the time. Or so I tell myself. The truth is, I don't like to come home and put something together without any planning, and I am terrible about planning ahead.

So what I really need to do is to get some menus together and do some shopping. Then, each night, I will have to think about the next day's dinner and defrost or make other preparations as necessary. And hey, suddenly that begins to sound so much like the way my mom used to do it!

Not that I don't want to do the Top Chef thing. I actually enjoy making really good recipes on occasion. I just need to learn to cook first.

Turning Thoughts Into Action

I read this article, which is pretty mundane stuff, but turning ideas into action is not my strong suit, so I read it. The first idea is to tell the world what you intend to do. Make a public proclamation. This is me giving that idea a try.

I believe that I can lose 50 pounds in a year if I really try. So that is my goal. By next April 10, my goal is to weigh 230 pounds. There it is. Of course, no one reads my blog, so it's not really so public, but maybe my wife will read it at least.

I actually have a reason for thinking I can lose so much weight. Recently I had to eat a low-iodine diet for medical reasons. There are various ways to avoid iodine without doing anything too extreme, but you have to research what you are eating, make sure foods are not made with iodized salt, that sort of thing. I just chose to avoid anything that might possibly contain iodine, which meant I went on a restricted diet that consisted of vegetables, fruits, unsalted nuts, and just a few ounces of meat a day. And I lost 19 pounds in three weeks.

Now, I wouldn't expect to keep up that kind of pace, but it makes a pound a week for 50 weeks seem pretty reasonable. There is no reason to avoid iodine, so I can modify the diet some -- fish and salt are both OK I think, for example -- but the basic ideas of avoiding grains, dairy, and prepared foods, and eating just a little bit of meat, are very workable.

So those are the thoughts. I'll make the additional commitment to post my progress every week. Now we'll see about the action.

Things My Dad Used to Say

This is the first version of a post that I hope will grow. As I add new things, I will try to put this post back at the top of my blog. I'm not sure how to do that, but I'll figure something out.

Sometimes things that my parents (Mom and Dad both, though I think of many of these as my Dad's) used to say pop into my head, often when I am speaking to my boys, and I have wanted to make a list for awhile. The problem is that I tend to think of these little sayings as they come up, but at any given time, I can't remember very many of them. Mostly, I don't say them myself, but they come to me occasionally when the situation matches the comment.

So I am going to start a list, and I hope to add to it over time. Maybe my siblings will take an interest and help me. With that, here are a few I can remember:

• "Straighten up and fly right." Usually said to me and/or my brother, telling us to stop screwing up.
• "You gotta hold your mouth right." As a means to assist in doing something difficult, like threading a needle.
• "Harder than the hinges of Hell." Meaning quite hard. Apparently Hell has doors or gates with very tough hinges.
• "Dirty ratchifratch." A multi-purpose euphemism. I remember Mom saying this one. Not sure of the spelling. Not sure this word has a spelling.
• "Six ways from Sunday." Doing something several different ways, as in "I've looked at this problem six ways from Sunday, but I still can't figure it out."

These are almost like old photographs to me, a way of connecting with the past. There are many more, but I will have to add to the list as I remember them.

Update 4/18: My sister Pat came up with a couple more good ones:

• "A bump of knowledge."  Said when one of us got a minor injury due to not being careful. 
• "You didn't finish the job."  Dad said this if one of us did a project and left a mess. Finishing the job is cleaning up.

Another one:

• "If it was a snake, it would have bit you."  Apparently lots of people say this.  It applies to something you were looking for that was right next to you.

Additional update:  a Google search for "ratchifratch" or something similar only turns up this post.  Maybe it was uniquely Mom's.

4/23/2012:  "How do you like them apples?"  Meaning what do you think of that?