How did you get to this point, you ask. Ah. Well, I discussed here, almost a year ago, that there was this thing at work that was causing me to lose sleep. I lost sleep many nights, literally, over the same issue since that post last April 1, and finally I am not working at Farmers. And as is the way with the corporate world, I still can't talk about it or write about it. I hope that explains everything. Thanks for asking.
After working at Farmers for almost 11 years, I feel almost nothing in terms of loss at leaving. I will miss my friends from work, but I don't think I get very attached to companies, which seems mentally healthy to me. The emotion I have felt most is relief -- relief that it's over, relief that I will never have to do certain tasks again. The second emotion is concern. We have resources, but I cannot live without an income forever. Still, that one is secondary for now, lurking in the background.
I have not done a lot yet to start looking for work. Tomorrow, I have an appointment with an outplacement firm, and I'm curious to see what they do. I have looked for a resume on my computer, but I don't see one; I guess I left that at work, but I can recreate it. Mostly, I have been either goofing off or doing things around the house. I am spending more time on Jarrod's homeschooling, and Jackie and I are working out most mornings. Jackie has encouraged me to take a little break, enjoy a two-week vacation or so.
I expect the search will start more in earnest tomorrow with the outplacement people. I have heard that they will try to push me. My break has given me time to focus on what my goal will be, and the one thing I know is that it will not be what I was doing, which was managing five people. For me, managing amounted to multitasking to such an extent that it was severely counter-productive and spending too much time on non-technical tasks that seemed to add little value. I can do more as an individual contributor.
Except for that little nagging concern about not finding work, I feel good about this. And I'm sleeping well.

You have ruined my carpooling life! I will only forgive you if you stay in touch. Let's walk your dog together some time!
ReplyDeleteJust when I was about to call and set up a lunch. But maybe now you'll have time in the next couple of weeks. Let me know if any of your searching brings you to Seattle, and we'll get together.
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